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Monday, 24 October 2005
Been a long time...
Mood:
 amorous
Topic: Casual Sex
Wow, I can't believe I haven't written in my blog since March....we have some DEFINITE catching up to do.
Let's see...to recap, I was in danger of being sprung off J.J.'s dick....not to worry, turns out it really was just the liquor. I went over to his place a few more times, but sober, and it wasn't as good as when I was on a Hennessey-fueled bender. An interesting note, though, was that I cut things off with him, letting him know that his lack of reciprocity was boring me. He tried to play it like, "well, I guess it's goodbye then"...but he can't let this good pussy go. He just asked me how long I was gonna make him suffer last week...
Interestingly enough, though, Walking Dildo and I have hit it off kinda well. I mean, he's still kind of an airhead, but he treats me really well, and he's an extremely adept lover. The only complaint that I have is that he doesn't fuck me hard enough, he's more of a love-maker, but other than that, it's great.
I did add another notch to my belt in between J.J. and W.D....and although I can't stand him and only slept with him once, I simply CANNOT get his cocky ass out of my mind. I'm still on track to find someone to call my man, and I can see that he's going to be an obstacle, either directly or indirectly. Allow me to explain:
He was my personal trainer. I remember when we (my sister and I) had signed up at the new gym in town, we were assigned to him, but he seemed to care less; all wrapped up in some other chick he was training that day, I remarked to my sister that if he'd stop trying to make a love connection he could get with our training. I wasn't really impressed with him, I mean he was cute, but not nothin' special.
My sister left the gym before she got a chance to train with him. We did a few sessions, and I found he was a jokester, and he had a tendency to talk too much, but nothing jumped off. My sister and I went on vacation shortly after that.
I changed my hair while in Vegas, and while to me it was nothing spectacular, it seemed to turn him on. Before I knew it, he was dropping subtle hints at first, then got around to just putting his interest out there. I stalled at first, because I'm not one to mix business with pleasure, and I felt like I probably wasn't the only woman there in who he'd expressed an interest. Eventually he wore me down, because it seemed that while he commenced with casual flirting with other women there, he was always up under me whenever I was there. He was calling me all times of the day, too.
See, piqued my interest, ladies and gents, because he came at me from a possible relationship angle. He kept me interested when our chats turned from general to sexual. He snagged me when he showed me pictures. Some of them were of him at the gym working out, some at home, of him, in his shorts. They were nice pictures. Extremely nice.
So the whore in me took over, and the next thing I knew I was telling him that we could take it to that level.
Eventually we did, but he sure did alot of trash-talking up to that point. It was good, but not all that he said it was gonna be. One thing that he came through on was his stamina - we were fucking for at least an hour. Straight.
The only thing though, and I'm sure you all can imagine what an ego-buster this was, he said he didn't cum. No one has ever told me that in life. I guess that's why it was the first and last time.
Or maybe not. I mean I think we're just confused. He would say something suggestive and I'd brush it off, and he'd do the same. Once I moved, I didn't go to the gym for weeks. I've only been three times since I've moved. The first time he wasn't there (I was kinda glad). The second time he was training someone, but he made his way to me eventually. We chatted for about 10 minutes, and he stood there not saying nothing for a couple of minutes, then we both left. The last time he was all over me.
I went at a time when I thought that he wouldn't be there. He came in maybe 15 minutes after I got started, spoke, and I guess signed in. I got off of my machine and went somewhere else, but he found me. So we chatted, and he ended up asking me if I had a "playmate". When I said no, he said that I needed somebody to help me relieve my stress. When I started complaining about living with my mom, he asked if he could get a room at my place. When I switched machines again, he followed again...I'm like, "are you working out today or just kicking the shit?" He told me that he was teaching a class. He went to speak to another lady, then came up behind me and pulled my hair. I think I moaned, and he was like, "oh, you like that?" I told him yes, and he'd better not start anything. He said we could film a porno right there in the middle of the gym. I said let me get my video cam.
Ok, so we didn't film the porno, but when I was finishing up for the evening, he grabbed me and hugged me...I kinda pushed him off, and he was like, "oh, it's like that now?" I certainly didn't want him to think so, because I can't get over him no matter how I try, so I was like, "You seem like you really miss me" while I stroked down his back with my water bottle. He grabbed me up again, and this time I didn't let go.
I haven't been back to the gym since. Like I said, he's going to be an obstacle to my efforts at finding a man, because either I'm going to let him back into my life as my man (knowing full well he's not good for me), or I'm going to compare every prospect to him, and they won't measure up, even if they're better than him. Heck, he's the reason I decided to get with W.D. He left me confused, I needed surety and comfort, and that's what W.D. provided for me.
I don't know why I love him like that. I just do. Lord help me...
Posted by phattestrabbit
at 2:49 PM EDT
Monday, 28 March 2005
Guess who's bizzack
Mood:
 cheeky
Topic: Getting 'Sprung'
I didn't mean to be gone so long, but I've been really, really busy...
Doesn't matter much, I've only had sex three times since my last entry. I won't go into detail on one of those instances, because it was almost non-existent, but I will tell you about the other two.
Things seem to be getting better with J.J. and I, sexually at least. I saw him again sometime in February. I was getting some work done on my house and all of a sudded realized that I wanted to see him. I called him up one night while I was on my way to the hardware store, and we made plans to see each other a few hours from then.
When I got home I poured myself a drink or two, got the kids settled, then headed over his way. I won't go into detail, but it was simply amazing. I mean, our times together are usually amazing, give or take a few sessions, but that time was AMAZING. My body quaked and convulsed so many times I lost count...I wish I knew what it was that made me do that...After a while, when I felt I was "done", he put me on my back and went at me so hard, he growled so fierce, I knew that he felt what I felt, too.
I thought it was a fluke, because I was tipsy, but I booked myself a room for my b-day this Saturday, and we met again...and again it was so good, I had to stop myself from crying. I didn't want to, but you know how we have to be so hard nowadays, especially in casual relationships...he would've taken it the wrong way and felt that he had me. Since I've seen how he gets a bit beside himself when he feels that way, I couldn't let that happen. But it did, it felt that good, and I'm in danger...
Posted by phattestrabbit
at 7:41 PM EST
Thursday, 27 January 2005
Tho'back lay
Mood:
 hungry
Now Playing: "When I Hear Your Name" - Regina Carter
Topic: Casual Sex
A few days ago I got an IM from an old "friend" of mine, one who I hadn't laid with since, shucks, July or August, I think. Let's call him J.J. J.J. and I go back to February '03. Man, I get chills every time I think of our first night - he was so authoritative and controlling, and he had such stamina, I got addickted real quick.
We were so compatible with each other, we couldn't seem to get enough of one another. But, alas, all good things must come to an end, and with the distance between each visit growing longer and longer, I figured it'd ended for sure. Apparently not.
I used to really want this man. Not so much as a bf (though I had contemplated it at one time), but I just wanted to be on him, under him, beside him all of my spare moments, but I think he sensed that and got cocky, stopped treating me like he used to, and I got turned off. When he popped up this week, I really didn't feel much other than surprise. He propositioned me, and I didn't really respond. I didn't know what to do. On the one hand I hadn't had any good sex since that night when I finally met T face to face (that had to be around early September), and was really wanting, but on the other, I just didn't want to start up a dead-end thing again. I'm getting older, thinking of settling down, not really feeling the casual thing anymore, but I don't know when I'll actually snag a boyfriend, and well my sex drive...
To make things worse, I had my annual exam the other day, and I don't know what the doctor did, but I think he left the faucet on lol. I mean I'm usually juicy anyway, but every time I use the potty, there are globs and globs of, well, me on the toilet paper, horny or not. Well, this morning I was experiencing that AND I was horny. And I had an attitude for some reason (never figured out why). I made up my mind. I was gonna take it out on him.
So I let him know I was coming over on my lunch break. I got there, and he answered the door naked, as usual. I used the bathroom then went and sat on the couch with him. He wanted me to give him head. I refused. I just had oral surgery for Pete's sake, I wasn't about to expose myself like that. Besides, I can't remember the last time he buried his face in the bush without it being a 69. I believe in reciprocity in that regard.
I played with his crooked dick for a while, then he wrapped up and I mounted him. I'd just come from outside and my thighs were cold. He inhaled and had a really pained look on his face; I thought I'd sat on his lap wrong. He said it was because I was so cold. I grabbed his dick, put it at my hole and said, "But this isn't". He responded with something to the effect of "you're damned right", and I commenced to riding. I rode it like I was trying to break it. He kept lifting up my skirt (I refused to get undressed) to watch my phat pussy swallow him up. He got excited seeing me cream on him so early on.
I got myself there just as he was about to get there. I thought we were gonna cum together, but he held on, put me on my back, my legs in the air, and finished himself like 5 minutes later. It was ok, but it wasn't what it used to me. Man, he'd have me all over the place, abusing it, tearing me up as best he could. He hardly moved my hips this time. I remember feeling like I needed to have sex. Not have sex again, just have sex, like it didn't happen.
I told my girl about it, she said it sounded like the conquest was achieved, that's why it wasn't fun for me any more. Now I'm wondering, if that's true, will I ever be satisfied with one man? Will I get bored with him after a year or so? Am I that much like a guy?
I don't know, but I'm gonna give myself all of this year to find out. My goal is to be coupled by the end of the year, thus rendering this blog obsolete by December lol.
Wish me luck.
Posted by phattestrabbit
at 10:54 PM EST
Wednesday, 29 December 2004
Prelude to a walking dildo
Mood:
 chillin'
Topic: Casual Sex
I'm going to be upfront - most of my recent sexual partners I've met over instant messenger. I just don't really have time to go out and meet people, and guys seem to be more receptive to me over fiber optic lines than in person, so...go figure.
So one of my friends, (I've yet to meet him), I'd say we've chatted for what has to be past 6 months now, has really made it clear that he's seeking a casual "relationship", with lots of sex and the friendship element added in. Ok, I've been in those situations before, and at the time I really wasn't looking for anything serious, so I figured I'd consider it.
But that was then and this is now, and I'm looking to really know someone now, even if we choose to keep it casual...I don't want sex to be the basis of the relationship. So I talk to this guy over IM, and while he says he doesn't want to be viewed as just a sex object, well, that's kinda the only way presents himself.
I recently finally got myself a more reliable vehicle, and my youngest son's dad (BD #2) has finally started keeping him more, so I figured there's no time like the present to start dating again. So when this friend, we'll call him DG, proposed that we meet, I finally agreed.
We recently had a conversation a couple of days ago regarding meeting up, and he said he wanted to get something out in the open, since we're both adults. Of course, when anybody says that, it means the subject matter is sex. He asked if I had any problems with him being a sexual person and things of that nature, to which I told him no...I mean if that's who he is, then fine, but I think it's a bit presumptuous on his part to assume that just because that's how he is, I'd follow suit. So most of the early conversation centered around sex and the possibility of it between us...then he asked if, in the event that it did happen, would I respect him in the morning? Because women are like that too, you know, only out for a nut, and he doesn't want to be disrespected.
That kinda pissed me off, because here he is, every other word is s-e-x, but he doesn't want me to view him as just a sex object. So I said why is it that whenever you bring up the fact that we're adults, we automatically have to start discussing sex? There are other aspects to adulthood in relation to our possible relationship that we can be discussing, yet the only thing you want to talk about is sex! You guys wanna know what his response was? "Why is it that women think all men want is sex?"
Gee, I don't know...maybe because all you've been talking about is sex?
Ok, so today I say I'll give him the benefit of the doubt, and try to talk to him about current events...mainly the horrific tragedy in Asia. First off, when I sent him the IM, I sent it with the smiley sticking it's tongue out...of course he tried to take it down a lewd avenue. I diverted as best I could, then I got around to asking him how he felt about the tsunami. You guys wanna know what his response was?
Sad.
Yesterday he went to great lengths to discuss the inner machinations of sex in the casual relationship as it may apply to ours, yet when I tried to get inside his head, to see if he's more than a pretty body and a hard dick, he can come up with no more than 'sad'.
So, folks, you know how he's gonna be rated. Definitely just a nut lol.
Posted by phattestrabbit
at 8:37 PM EST
Thursday, 23 December 2004
Baby Daddy #2 and my Far Away Friend back in town...
Mood:
amorous
Topic: Multiple Partners
So my mom and my sister went out of town...I called BD#2 over to keep me company, because I didn't want to be home alone with the kids for that period of time. I honestly didn't want sex from him. I mean, I wanted sex, but the only person I really wanted it from only comes to town periodically, and I never know when that'll be, so I just decided to go for platonic company instead. I didn't plan on sleeping with BD#2, but you know what they say about the best laid plans...
The first night I did ok. I mean, he's so immature anyway, I don't know what I saw in him to begin with. His childishness turns me off to no end. What had happened was the furnace died, and I asked him to sleep in my bed for the body heat. I honestly did make it through the night. That next morning, though, well, he was spooning me, and he slid his leg between mine, so that he could lift it and put his hand between my legs. That's not childish at all. He got be exicted, so I went for it. Hell, I'm only human. It wasn't good, not for me anyway. He couldn't get a good rhythm going, he kept threatening to cum. Soon enough, he did. Oh well.
Same thing happened the next morning, although it started out really, really good, then ended up really, really bad. I think he bruised my cervix. No lie, this was like 2 days ago and I'm still having pelvic tenderness. For some reason whenever I do it doggy style with someone who has a large penis, it hurts. It didn't used to, but all of a sudden it does. I think it has something to do with all this weight I gained, that's the only thing that's changed with me. I need to discuss it with my GYN. Well, I guess that's too personal. Anyhoo, I tried to take it as long as I could, but I gave up and turned back on my back. That didn't help it be any better, but at least he lasted longer this time. I was sure glad when it was over. I carried an attitude all that day. I kept thinking to myself how I'd only feel better once I had sex with someone else, someone better. Turns out, I was absolutely right.
So I know you're wondering where the multiple partner aspect comes in. I bet you thought I was about to break out with a story about a freaky-assed menage-a-trois, didn't you? I would've elaborated, but there is a character limit in the topic box. As such, I meant more than one person in a day. Menage-enough, I guess lol. I actually only had oral sex with my second partner, and I was the only giver, but for some reason it was more satisfying than with BD#2. I can only guess it's because I have a horrible crush on T (I can't remember his last name, else I'd put both initials lol). I know that makes me slutty, but I honestly asked him a few years back...since last names aren't a frequent part of conversation, it's only natural that a sista'd forget, right? Anyhow, what I do know of him really rings my bells, so much that just hearing his voice is satisfying...
He IMed me and I discovered he was in town (man, if only he'd come a day or two prior), and since BD#2 was still here to watch the kids, I told T I'd swing by the hotel. There's no telling how many times BD#2's done it to me, left me with the kids while taking MY vehicle over some hoodrat's house to fuck, so I felt absolutely no guilt about doing the same to him, even though we're not together. So I went to see T, and we lounged around for a while, watching T.V. and I guess trying to think of the best way of putting things in motion (I know I was...I don't know why I get butterflies with him. Even though I'm crushing on him, he still is just a booty call, after all). After a while, he finally asked if he could kiss me. When I agreed, he was holding me and kissing me so passionately, I didn't know what to do. So I pulled his dick out an asked him what he wanted me to do...you can just about guess what his reply was. So I took him from the couch to the bed, we both undressed, and I laid him on his back, where I commenced to slobbin' him up something terrible...he came in 10 minutes, no lie. Usually the combination of the quick cum and lack of reciprocity is a sure-fire way of pissing me off, but in this case I was simply content with having pleased him. Knowing that I sucked him off so tough that he wrapped his legs around me, that of all of the women in the world, I was the one to do that to him, that made me happy. I guess it's because even though he's a booty call, he just doesn't fuck...he makes love. His kisses are like clouds in a summer storm, soft and hot and wet...he holds you, grabs you like he wants you to meld with him...he touches you, inside and out, with gentle care, but he knows exactly where to touch you, especially inside. Then, when he finally sees that you can't take anymore of his caresses, he plunges inside of you with that sweet mix of pleasure and pain (because he's fine and exquisitely well-endowed) that you only read about in trashy novels. Even then, when he's searching for his own pleasure, he makes sure that you're getting all the comfort you can stand. He makes love. I only wish I could love him all his days. Shit, this post was just supposed to be about the sex...
Posted by phattestrabbit
at 10:35 PM EST
An Introduction, and my purpose
Mood:
 don't ask
Hello everyone, and welcome to my blog. Here you will find true tales of all of my sexual exploits, in excruitating detail (or not, depending on my mood) as they happen. I was considering waiting until after the new year to start this off, but since I have sex so infrequently (through no choice of my own), and I just recently had a chance to play a little catch up since my mom and sister were away on vacation, I decided that there's no time like the present.
I'm a grown woman, by the way, and the only reason I don't have sex at home is because I was raised to believe that it's disrespectful to do so when your parents are in the house, though sometimes I just wait until she goes to sleep lol.
I decided to do this because of boredom, plain and simple. No need to fill an exhibitionist void in my heart. Actually I want to see if I get alot of traffic due to the nature of this blog. We shall see. Also, this is a community blog, so if you'd like to share your experiences, feel free!
With that out of the way, let me begin...
Posted by phattestrabbit
at 9:51 PM EST
Updated: Thursday, 23 December 2004 10:44 PM EST
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